Sunday, November 09, 2003
My cat broke my dishwasher
Tango the Wonder Kitty, bless his little heart, has a tendency to stand on the counter above the dishwasher and using his nimble little paws to open the door... just because he can. Last night he apparently decided to do it again. When I awoke this morning, I discovered the door not only open, but cracked around the hinges so it no longer closes. My guess is Tango opened it and one of the dogs decided to climb on the door in an effort to investigate the contents on the counter, or to investigate Tango.
So we need a new dishwasher. My brother had one given to him by a friend, fortunately, so he'll be bringing it out and installing it later this week. Here's hoping it works. If it does, it will be kept latched from now on, and possibly padlocked, chained, and welded shut. Tango will be kept locked in a closet for the rest of his life.
Okay, maybe not. But he is quite the pain in the posterior end. He's broken other things in the past, including a lamp, drinking glasses, etc. I can't even begin to tell you how much stuff he's knocked off, over, and around. The amount of toilet paper alone he's shredded would be enough to clean the behinds of the members of an average tribal village for a year. And the boy is only three-years-old. Considering cats live around 12-15 years (I had one live to just shy of 20), I'm in for many more years of Tango-induced fun. And to think I acquired him on purpose.
I'm afraid. Very afraid. Maybe I should lock myself in a closet for the rest of Tango's life. But then I would be a literal in-the-closet lesbian, wouldn't I? Too much of a cliche. There isn't any internet access in the closet, anyway, so that's definitely out.
Seek and ye shall find
Speaking of lesbians -- and, quite frankly, who wouldn't want to speak of lesbians -- I've discovered some folks have found their way to this here blog via some interesting search engine keywords.... such as:
Most of those came from my rambling about talk show summaries, among other things. If you're one of those who found your way here using such keywords, then by golly, make yourself at home! Everyone is welcome here, including those boys dressed as lesbian girls who've been cheating on their diaper clad husbands with CNN's Anderson Cooper's boy/girlfriend, taking pictures in various sexual positions while on the Jerry Springer Show.
It takes all kinds, after all. I'm just glad you made it, and I hope you enjoy your stay. And come back soon, now, y'hear? You never know what I'm going to ramble about next. I know I certainly don't, and I'm the one writing them. Chances are, I won't even know what my rambles are about even after I've written them. I don't pay too much attention.
I'm going to go now and stare thoughtfully and purposefully at my still yet to be packed away Halloween decorations now. Take care, friends, and tune in next time when I ramble about... er... um... huh. Damned if I know. But I'm sure it will be just thrilling, as always.
So we need a new dishwasher. My brother had one given to him by a friend, fortunately, so he'll be bringing it out and installing it later this week. Here's hoping it works. If it does, it will be kept latched from now on, and possibly padlocked, chained, and welded shut. Tango will be kept locked in a closet for the rest of his life.
Okay, maybe not. But he is quite the pain in the posterior end. He's broken other things in the past, including a lamp, drinking glasses, etc. I can't even begin to tell you how much stuff he's knocked off, over, and around. The amount of toilet paper alone he's shredded would be enough to clean the behinds of the members of an average tribal village for a year. And the boy is only three-years-old. Considering cats live around 12-15 years (I had one live to just shy of 20), I'm in for many more years of Tango-induced fun. And to think I acquired him on purpose.
I'm afraid. Very afraid. Maybe I should lock myself in a closet for the rest of Tango's life. But then I would be a literal in-the-closet lesbian, wouldn't I? Too much of a cliche. There isn't any internet access in the closet, anyway, so that's definitely out.
Seek and ye shall find
Speaking of lesbians -- and, quite frankly, who wouldn't want to speak of lesbians -- I've discovered some folks have found their way to this here blog via some interesting search engine keywords.... such as:
- jerry springer diapers
- jerry springer lesbian family affair
- anderson cooper's girlfriend
- anderson cooper's boyfriend
- sexual positions pictures
- boys dressed as girls
- i've been cheating on my husband
Most of those came from my rambling about talk show summaries, among other things. If you're one of those who found your way here using such keywords, then by golly, make yourself at home! Everyone is welcome here, including those boys dressed as lesbian girls who've been cheating on their diaper clad husbands with CNN's Anderson Cooper's boy/girlfriend, taking pictures in various sexual positions while on the Jerry Springer Show.
It takes all kinds, after all. I'm just glad you made it, and I hope you enjoy your stay. And come back soon, now, y'hear? You never know what I'm going to ramble about next. I know I certainly don't, and I'm the one writing them. Chances are, I won't even know what my rambles are about even after I've written them. I don't pay too much attention.
I'm going to go now and stare thoughtfully and purposefully at my still yet to be packed away Halloween decorations now. Take care, friends, and tune in next time when I ramble about... er... um... huh. Damned if I know. But I'm sure it will be just thrilling, as always.
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